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Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Fatal mistakes that new relationships make!

Is this a second marriage or a new relationship after a breakdown?

Keep your financial situation separate:
Generally it is better to keep your finances separate.
Except for a joint bank account which is used to pay all the budgeted joint expenses.
A sum of money from each party can be deposited into the joint account each month.
This way the financial well being of both parties is maintained and the opportunity for fraud is reduced.
If a person has a problem with this, RUN.....

Only own things together as "Tenants in Common."
Always have a written agreement which states the proportion you each own - kept with your executor. This means that your share of the asset is always dealt with by you and your estate.
In "Joint Tenants," the ownership of the asset automatically passes to the survivor on death of the other. It does not go through your Will, nor can you say what happens to it.

On sale of a "tenants in common" asset, hold your own share in a separate bank account.
All too often, the money is put in a joint bank account, one of the parties dies, and the funds go to the other person immediately.
It wont matter that you had "both must sign" on the account.

Always have a Will which states your wishes.
Draft it with your beneficiaries involved, with legal help, making certain your partner is informed and aware.
Avoid relying on your partners good nature - "if you die first, I'll make certain your kids get a share."
It can work, but is imprudent to allow the potential for abuse.
Consider how long the person can live in the common home before it must be sold.
Probably better to consider 1, 3, 5 years, or whatever suits you both.
It can create enormous ill-will and heartache when people are forced to wait for an estate.

Suit yourself, however be business-like.
If you are older than 21, you may have had more than one relationship.
In business, written agreements are the norm and potential conflict is discussed and reduced.
Financial arrangements are business arrangements.
Protecting your financial well being is protecting your life - it should be done thoroughly.
If you play it like a game of chance, you stand to lose a huge amount.

Share a life together with joint decision making.
People who understand that a person needs to be prudent, are perhaps the ones to get and hold onto.
Bullying, pouting, pleading do not indicate the relationship will go far.
Make decisions jointly, with all the factors considered. Participate.
Certainly, you can now jointly afford that $1,000,000 mansion, but do you want to clean it?
Perhaps a more modest home with travel would give you much greater pleasure.

A new relationship can be a cause for optimism and pleasure.

Be aware of your needs, and it will most likely remain a source of these things.

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